Superpoop: 2014
Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

04-30-06: absorbing

Married To The Sea comic: absorbing * Text: 

Hey man, what up?


Just hanging out, you know, absorbing nutrients and shit.

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04-29-06: happy new year

Married To The Sea comic: happy new year * Text: 

Okay, it's...okay, seve, six, five, four, three, two, one, happy new year's. Will one of you wake up Herman and tell him it's the new year.

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04-28-06: thanks for nothing south dakota

Married To The Sea comic: thanks for nothing south dakota * Text: 

Here, this kid is your problem now. Thanks!

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04-27-06: impress her

Married To The Sea comic: impress her * Text: 

Oh, my!


IMPRESS HER VAGINA WITH a HUGE CLOCK


V1@gra c1@lis softabs as low as $4.72 valium as low as $2.85 cheap online med. catons at LICENSED ON LINE PHARTMACY

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04-26-06: all my ether heads say what

Married To The Sea comic: all my ether heads say what * Text: 

Sunday, March 19, 1889. The ether bong was tested, and it was quite a success.

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04-25-06: wine angel

Married To The Sea comic: wine angel * Text: 

Time out! Time out guys! It's me, the wine angel. It looks like you need a wine break.

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04-24-06: dude

Married To The Sea comic: dude * Text: 

Dude, what the fuck is that giant rooster doing here?


I don't know, dude. Just keep mining.

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04-23-06: wax cylinder

Married To The Sea comic: wax cylinder * Text: 

What in the world? I wonder what the ambulance is doing here.


Wait, I think that was just a siren in the background of this wax cylinder. Damn. I hate that.

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04-22-06: top eight

Married To The Sea comic: top eight * Text: 

Well, I mean... why do you think you're not in my top 8?

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04-21-06: the metaphor

Married To The Sea comic: the metaphor * Text: 

No, you can't be a batter. That doesn't even make sense. You're either a pitcher or a catcher. You have to pick one.


Well, the metaphor just doesn't extend that far, is why.

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04-20-06: urine sample

Married To The Sea comic: urine sample * Text: 

DRINK IT THIS IS YOUR ONLY CHANCE


DO IT NOW


Here's my urine sample, doctor.

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04-19-06: iron and whine

Married To The Sea comic: iron and whine * Text: 

Before you die... I must tell you something!


I... I loved your song on the M&Ms commercial. It was just... wonderful. Just a wonderful song.


I love M&Ms. I wish you could have some.

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04-18-06: tub wheels

Married To The Sea comic: tub wheels * Text: 

TUB-ON-WHEELS


Bathe in the privacy of your own porch


Lightweight 285-lb construction


Play World of Warcraft for weeks at a time in a tub of your own shit

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04-17-06: vegan

Married To The Sea comic: vegan * Text: 

I've never seen the inside of a rabbit's brain before. What's in there, anyway?


Nobody knows yet. Johnson and I are hoping it's cupcakes.


Me too. Except vegan cupcakes. Because I'm a vegan. Vegans don't eat animals or animal prod-


I know what vegan means, Thomas. You've told us.


Well, I was just saying, because-


I know what vegan means.

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04-16-06: twins

Married To The Sea comic: twins * Text: 

Maybe we'll get there at the SAME TIME and then we'll be TWINS! That would be AWESOME!

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04-15-06: shoemaker

Married To The Sea comic: shoemaker * Text: 

I've got the shoe size of every woman in this town on record. If you're asking if I've ever made a duplicate pair of shoes to take home and masturbate into, well, of course I have. I'm a shoemaker. You don't go into shoemaking to get rich.

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04-14-06: postman

Married To The Sea comic: postman * Text: 

Then, you put the letter in the box, and the postman takes it to its destination as fast as he can!


What? They said what? Who told them that? I mean, yeah, I deliver the mail, but I also don't give a fuck.

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04-13-06: roast boy served medium

Married To The Sea comic: roast boy served medium * Text: 

A hundred and four-ty Degrees!! Medium- just as your Papa likes it. It appears that You are ready for Dinner, young Man.

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04-12-06: podcast

Married To The Sea comic: podcast * Text: 

Hey! Other angels! Get over here! The new issue of Wired has a podcast built into it! Check it out!


Oh, hold on, wait, this is just some guy with a fifty-dollar haircut talking over a Sufjan Stevens song. Never mind.

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04-11-06: pharmacy angel

Married To The Sea comic: pharmacy angel * Text: 

So, I have to ask. What's it like being a pharmacy angel?


It's a lot like being a regular angel, actually. The only difference is that I get to write prescriptions.


Oh. ... Ohhhhhh. Say... can you write me, aah-


Well, that depends- can I have this coat for free?


Well, that depends on whether you can get me OxyContins.

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04-10-06: jethro tull

Married To The Sea comic: jethro tull * Text: 

tweet tweet i'm the best


Mildren Oxberry


First place winner in the 1886 Annual Jethro Tull Air Flute Contest

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04-09-06: little old doctor

Married To The Sea comic: little old doctor * Text: 

Look at me! I'm the heart of Minnie Wilkins! I'm too good to marry a little old doctor! I'm going to get eaten for dinner tonight.

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04-08-06: jerkoff tent

Married To The Sea comic: jerkoff tent * Text: 

Woman, I said I've had enough of this infernal rick-shaw! Take me back to the jerkoff tent at once!

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04-07-06: goodbye blacklung

Married To The Sea comic: goodbye blacklung * Text: 

Well, you know, they just discovered nuclear power in New Mexico, so I guess we won't have to be coal miners in a few months! That's going to be great! I'll be like, goodbye, blacklung!

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04-06-06: ear dicks

Married To The Sea comic: ear dicks * Text: 

So, I'm looking in your ear here... how many dicks would you say you shove up there on, say, a weekly basis? Ten, twenty perhaps? Anyway, I'm guessing that's what's been causing your ear to become clogged with dried semen.

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04-05-06: book gang

Married To The Sea comic: book gang * Text: 

yeah


that's right


Listen, you god-damn magazine-Us books have seen y ou in our library and we don't like it.


You better watch yourself here, so's you don't end up with, say, all your pages pulled out.

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04-04-06: press r3 to activate chimney sweep

Married To The Sea comic: press r3 to activate chimney sweep * Text: 

100


000002


Hyde Park


I need that shit you drive.

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04-03-06: dead picnic

Married To The Sea comic: dead picnic * Text: 

Mary, I'm getting a weird feeling...we've been on this picnic for six weeks now, and I never have to eat or urinate. I think...we're dead.


Oh, William... We must be! We're... we're in heaven!


Well, I killed a guy once, so this isn't heaven.

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04-02-06: chiseling

Married To The Sea comic: chiseling * Text: 

Wait, let me hold the hammer up like I'm chiseling. Okay...did you get the picture? Sweet. This is gonna look awesome on my Myspace page.

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04-01-06: fuck horses

Married To The Sea comic: fuck horses * Text: 

FUCK HORSES

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Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec