Superpoop: 2014
Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

02-29-08: shave my baby

Married To The Sea comic: shave my baby * Text: 

tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap


Hey. Nurse. Hey...Can you shave my baby? It creeps me out when they come with hair.

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02-28-08: asperger king

Married To The Sea comic: asperger king * Text: 

Welcome to Asperger King


Your extremely specific fast food order is our mumble mumble.

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02-27-08: slowtards

Married To The Sea comic: slowtards * Text: 

Out of my way, slow-tards! I've got some pavement to smear.

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02-26-08: pokemon

Married To The Sea comic: pokemon * Text: 

Bobby, I'm seeing some marks on the inside of your truth tooth. Did you do anything bad in the past six months? Let me take a closer look.


Oh, my. Have you told a lie to anyone? I'm going to have to polish this out so your mother doesn't see. She's going to be really mad if she notices!


It's going to be expensive to get you out of trouble, Bobby. .. do you have anything to kick in? Maybe some Pokemon cards?


1700 plus Pokemon Trading Cards Mint condition

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02-25-08: home dead revival kit

Married To The Sea comic: home dead revival kit * Text: 

Still nothing... bah! I'm starting to think this Rachael Ray Home Dead Revival Kit is full of shit.

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02-24-08: state your name

Married To The Sea comic: state your name * Text: 

Halt! State your name and your business!


Braden, say your rap.


Braden, do it!


My naaaame, is Ol Dirty Bas'
My gaaaame, is to kick your ass
Dun dun dun dun dun dun
Dun dun old lady is weird

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02-23-08: two pubes

Married To The Sea comic: two pubes * Text: 

Open your mouth... thank you! I'll just check your -- oh, dude, you have a pube in your teeth.

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02-22-08: dog checkup

Married To The Sea comic: dog checkup * Text: 

Your dog will be fine, ma'am. I'm palpating his digestive tract, and it sounds like he ate some ceramic insulation. Have you left him unattended recently? Like, maybe...in the same room as a space shuttle?

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02-21-08: great job you fished me

Married To The Sea comic: great job you fished me * Text: 

Oh, great job, dick. You fished me. What are you gonna do now? Put me in your truck and drive back home?

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02-20-08: blah blah prostitute

Married To The Sea comic: blah blah prostitute * Text: 

You know what, dude? I gotta come clean. We aren't really gonna raft down the Mississippi like I said. Up there, in that stand of trees to the left, is a nice ol' lady who's gonna show you all about women. All you have to do is lay back and relax.


Your mom was against the idea, of course, on account of her gettin' red in the stretchmarks every time I even say the word

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02-19-08: horsubway

Married To The Sea comic: horsubway * Text: 

Built in 1822 by the enterprising Henry O'Sullivan, the Cincinnati Horsubway ran its first and only car for just a single day, on April 25. Riders complained bitterly about the slow amble of the horses, especially through the unlit horsubway tunnels. At four o'clock that afternoon, a group of enraged passengers rushed the Horsubway cab with torches, ending its service after only six hours.

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02-18-08: keep digging

Married To The Sea comic: keep digging * Text: 

Keep digging, Bruno... there are more dogs where these came from.

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02-17-08: no pressure

Married To The Sea comic: no pressure * Text: 

This test will determine which classes you will take during the next three years of high school, and will more or less define your social circle until you leave this building. 



Begin the test.... now.

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02-16-08: express my humors

Married To The Sea comic: express my humors * Text:

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02-15-08: mr long showers

Married To The Sea comic: mr long showers * Text: 

Shit, my glasses are in the truck... is tat 62014... or 82014? Ah, dammit.



I'm gonna go with 82014.


Oh, look who's home. It's Mr. Long Showers. Well, guess what. Our water bill was four grand this month.

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02-14-08: much cooler

Married To The Sea comic: much cooler * Text: 

It doesn't get much cooler than this!


Unless you include cars

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02-12-08: survey crew

Married To The Sea comic: survey crew * Text: 

Excuse me! Miss! With the papers! Can you move a little bit to the left? Left... no, my left. Your right. I need to survey that ass.

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02-11-08: syndicated comics

Married To The Sea comic: syndicated comics * Text: 

Drawing this comic is awesome! I can't wait until the syndicate gets their hands on this and squeezes out all the humor.

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02-10-08: my degree

Married To The Sea comic: my degree * Text: 

My degree enabled me to begin my ccareer path four years later than my peers!


Look, I'm still here on the bottom rung! Woooooo!


Thanks, college!

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02-09-08: me and yellow tail

Married To The Sea comic: me and yellow tail * Text: 

Listen, Michael... I don't wanna tell you what to do... but, honestly. Your boss is full of shit.  Wouldn't you be a lot happier if you quit? If you get bored during the day, you can always come here. Me and Yellow Tail are never going to get on your case like that.

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02-08-08: mighty angel

Married To The Sea comic: mighty angel * Text: 

We made that! Don't drop it!


Noooo! Our stone circle!



COME ON, DUDE


And the mighty angel took up the villager's stone, and hearing not their cries, cast the great artifact into the river.

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02-07-08: food and drug administration

Married To The Sea comic: food and drug administration * Text:

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02-06-08: fishes aint shit

Married To The Sea comic: fishes aint shit * Text: 

Fishes ain't shit


but roe and fish

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02-05-08: captain speaking

Married To The Sea comic: captain speaking * Text: 

This is your captain speaking. Next stop is whenever. Just be like,

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02-04-08: swimming strokes

Married To The Sea comic: swimming strokes * Text: 

Common strokes used in swimming


Breaststroke: The swimmer is oriented face-down in the water. Scissor kicks propel the swimmer forward. Face is below the surface of the water.


Backstroke: The swimmer is oriented face-up. Arms follow a semi-circular movement. The swimmer's face is above water.


Soulja Boy: The swimmer makes frequent reference to ejaculating on a whore's back. Arms follow predetermined pattern.

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02-03-08: border champion

Married To The Sea comic: border champion * Text: 

She takes it to the wall... dodges left... spins right... pastes... it looks good... YES! Nothin' but floral borders!

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02-02-08: aloha

Married To The Sea comic: aloha * Text: 

Aloha and welcome to Hawaii!


Here's something made in China!

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02-01-08: how to bake

Married To The Sea comic: how to bake * Text: 

Pull those muffins out... careful... there you go! Set them on the counter to cool.


Now keep doing this every day for a man who doesn't love you, and you can grow up to be just like Mommy!

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Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec