Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2017: jan : feb
2016: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2015: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
 

01-31-16: shakespeare garbage

Married To The Sea comic: shakespeare garbage * Text: I hate this Shakespeare garbage! Awful! Poorly written, unreadable without footnotes. Better make sure teenagers have to read it for some reason though.

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01-30-16: i see ya eyeball

Married To The Sea comic: i see ya eyeball * Text: I see ya damn eyeball! It's huge in there! Haha! I see your eyeball and all the stuff you're thinkin' bout! Why you thinkin' bout kissing my survey thing though? Jake? You wanna kiss my tripod? Weird, man.

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01-29-16: got some amazon prime

Married To The Sea comic: got some amazon prime * Text: Hey! Got some Amazon Prime for you here, man! Gotta ask though, you don't want to go to some nasty mall where sick people coughed on all the stuff instead? Seems kinda weird.

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01-28-16: reading poetry

Married To The Sea comic: reading poetry * Text: You reading? cool, I'll let-whoa, hold on, that's poetry? Here, I'll throw that in the trash for you so you don't have to get up.

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01-27-16: please lord jail

Married To The Sea comic: please lord jail * Text: Please, Lord, if you get me out of this, I promise-I'll never jelq again! I'll only jelq a little bit! Only twice a day! Promise!

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01-26-16: man come out the box

Married To The Sea comic: man come out the box * Text: And...fwaaaaAAaAaA! I make the man come out of the box! It was a spring man but I get that its important to you so ima let it go

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01-25-16: my croquet

Married To The Sea comic: my croquet * Text: My croquet! You hitted my damn croquet and I need that thing!!! The hell are you doing?!

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01-24-16: enough fertilizer

Married To The Sea comic: enough fertilizer * Text: This is enough fertilizer, don't you think? Better dump the whole bag on there. We want this motherfucker to get big.

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01-23-16: what a hamburger is

Married To The Sea comic: what a hamburger is * Text: No, I don't know what a hamburger is, as a matter of fact. You think the CEO of a tire company needs to know what a tire looks like? Ha! You're fired, smart-ass. Go. And take your stupid little round sandwich with you.

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01-22-16: welcome to bus

Married To The Sea comic: welcome to bus * Text: Welcome to Bus! It's a big car that you sleep or jack off inside of, or bleed on. Bus is like Subway but it crashes more. Dollar fifty please.

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01-21-16: call me pingu

Married To The Sea comic: call me pingu * Text: You just call me Pingu? For real? Fly the fuck outta here before I cook some fries in your ass.

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01-20-16: the cows head

Married To The Sea comic: the cows head * Text: Perfect! This should keep the cow's head at dick-sucki-I mean milking height.

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01-19-16: i rip you book

Married To The Sea comic: i rip you book * Text: I rip you book! You wanna put sign up? Then I rip you book. Ass hole. Book...damn book ass.

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01-18-16: fooled your doctor

Married To The Sea comic: fooled your doctor * Text: Look, buddy...You may have fooled your doctor, but don't think for a moment I believe you have

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01-17-16: drop those wussysticks

Married To The Sea comic: drop those wussysticks * Text: Drop those wussysticks, Adam. Walk on your own two feet like a real man. Come on. Drop 'em. Look, you know who else used ladder-pegs? Yeah. That's right. You know who I'm talking about.

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01-16-16: barbell squats

Married To The Sea comic: barbell squats * Text: Please...I know I don't ever do barbell squats, but I promise you-Shhh. Adieu, mini-legs.

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01-15-16: beanfucker

Married To The Sea comic: beanfucker * Text: You make the coffee, beanfucker. Because you're actually the beanfucker, not me. That's what I'll tell them.

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01-14-16: give me the rap

Married To The Sea comic: give me the rap * Text: CRIMINY CHRISTMAS!!! What is that yowling, howling racket?! Give me the good yelling and drum sounds of Rap!

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01-13-16: gas is cheaper

Married To The Sea comic: gas is cheaper * Text: Wow, gas is cheaper now that there's too much oil...This is probably permanent. It'll probably be cheaper forever now.

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01-12-16: mother fucking ed zitron

Married To The Sea comic: mother fucking ed zitron * Text: IT'S MOTHERFUCKING ED ZITRON

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01-11-16: beautiful fire

Married To The Sea comic: beautiful fire * Text: It's beautiful, Angela. Yes... it is... and yet I am only reminded that it'll take years to burn all the rest of the trees on the cursed planet.

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01-10-16: man to man

Married To The Sea comic: man to man * Text: Look, waiter... Man to man... Why don't you put down the apron and get a high-paying job like us? Something that helps society, like making millions by running a company into the ground.

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01-09-16: what did you get me

Married To The Sea comic: what did you get me * Text: The iPad Air? Nope, try again. iPad Pro? Here's a hint...it's not an iPad.

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01-08-16: people are so stupid

Married To The Sea comic: people are so stupid * Text: People are so stupid. A lot of them don't even want to use Bitcoin even after I explain it.

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01-07-16: rabies aint no thing

Married To The Sea comic: rabies aint no thing * Text: Rabies ain't no thing! Get ya damn neck out and let me suck on that thing and fly back outside! No big deal!

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01-06-16: presidential media coverage

Married To The Sea comic: presidential media coverage * Text: Since it will be impossible to get any media coverage if I promise a brighter future for everyone, I hereby announce that should I become president, I will outlaw vegetables, because they're gross. So vote for me if you hate vegetables. Thank you.

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01-05-16: ribbon cutting

Married To The Sea comic: ribbon cutting * Text: In an effort to boost ribbon sales, Jort Plemumbies, the mayor of Ribbonton, began to cut large ribbons in public. The idea spread rapidly, and the town's industry enjoyed unprecedented success.

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01-04-16: you kiss i toot

Married To The Sea comic: you kiss i toot * Text: No, the horn is part of the deal. You kiss, I toot. Toot for kiss. You stop kissing and I stop tooting. It ain't algebra.

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01-03-16: late to the party

Married To The Sea comic: late to the party * Text: Shit! Shitshitshit! I can't believe I'm gonna be late to the destruction of society through materialism!

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01-02-16: just about to ask the floorwaiter

Married To The Sea comic: just about to ask the floorwaiter * Text: Ah! I was just about to ask if I could have some more. Thank you, floorwaiter.

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01-01-16: shuttlecock

Married To The Sea comic: shuttlecock * Text: YO DID THAT LADY JUST SAY SHUTTLECOCK? HAHAHA BRO SHE DID...SHE SAID SHUTTLECOCK...Ahhhhhh, shit. These guys again. You say shuttlecock once and they go totally nuts.

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Married To The Sea archives (by month):

2017: jan : feb
2016: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2015: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2014: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2013: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2012: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2011: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2010: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2009: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2008: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2007: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec
2006: jan : feb : mar : apr : may : jun : jul : aug : sep : oct : nov : dec